Taken from Jonathan/Claudia/Portia, who all got it from someone else (I just feel like doing it):

Last cigarette: Don't smoke.
Last car ride: Home from track practice.
Last kiss: After school in the parking lot. Yeah, I'm one of those annoying people who commits PDAs.
Last good cry: Umm... Hmm. I cried some last night, it was a decent cry. But full out good cry? Probably the night of the 10th.
Last book read: Currently reading The Things They Carried for class and Immortality for pleasure.
Last cuss word uttered: Not sure, most likely damn. Because I say that often.
Last beverage drank: Milk
Last food consumed: Ben and Jerry's Cherry Garica. Damn good stuff.
Last crush: My on-going love for the distance guys... Hah.
Last phone call: A telemarketer. She asked if my dad was Philip Roth the writer. It was odd.
Last tv show watched: Gilmore Girls
Last time showered: This evening, after my bike ride. Well, technically it was a bath. Actual shower: this morning.
Last shoes worn: My running shoes. New Balance.
Last cd played: Rooney, CD of the same name.
Last item bought: Food at lunch - pizza and a drink. Yummy.
Last downloaded: Uh... No idea.
Last annoyance: My mother's update on my grandma's health while I was otherwise occupied.
Last disappointment: Myself, for various reasons.
Last soda drank: Sprite, I think...
Last thing written: Random note of something to remember.
Last key used: My car key.
Last words spoken: "I'll be off in a bit" - to my mom about the computer.
Last sleep: Last night, from a little after midnight to about 5:15.
Last IM: John
Last sexual fantasy: I plead the 5th.
Last weird encounter: My friends in general.
Last ice cream eaten: See last food eaten.
Last time amused: Hmm. Today at practice, with the cane-ball fiasco.
Last time wanting to die: Ooh. Not sure. Not too recent. I'm happy right now. YAY!
Last time in love: Now, and now, and now... You get the idea.
Last time hugged: Um... Probably after school today.
Last time scolded: My mother. She really wants the computer.
Last time resentful: I think I'm always resentful in some way.
Last chair sat in: This lovely computer chair.
Last underwear worn: Boring, normal white. I'm plain.
Last shirt worn: Weezer t-shirt. "If it's too loud, turn it down."
Last time dancing: Maybe around me room, listening to music. Real dancing? Prom.
Last poster looked at: Uh, any of the many in my room, I suppose. Newsies, Poe, Weezer, Monet -- it was one of 'em.
Last show attended: If movies count, The Matrix: Reloaded. If they don't, my choir performance Sunday. Otherwise the spring play.
Last webpage visited: I attempted to visit Sketti. It was down.

Okay, giving the computer to my mother now...