For some reason, I decided to see what Ann Coulter has been writing lately -- I think it was reading a parody of an inane journalist that reminded me of her. But I actually read two of her columns, and I must say, my brain is most unhappy with me. It took a little more than 2,000 words to fully enrage me -- probably much less than that, but we'll give her the benefit of the doubt and say it took both columns to do the job. Her ideas are, of course, immensely frustrating. The terms she uses are occasionally beyond belief... For instance, the "ban on girl priests"... Girl priests. Girl. Not female, not women. Girls. I didn't realize anyone was discussing whether 12-year old girls should be allowed to be priests. 30-year old women, sure. But last time I checked, most people didn't refer to them as "girls." Though I suppose she could have said "gal priests" and made me that much angrier even faster.

Perhaps my biggest problem is that she really can't write that well. "Come Back, Liberals!" was perhaps one of the most painful things I've read in a long time. It's vaguely stream-of-consciousness, or maybe more like an outline, as it seems to be only loosely connected to any main idea and has many 1 and 2 sentence "paragraphs"... You could maybe take this and make some structurally decent if you really tried, but it's probably not worth it. How is it that this woman has one book, let alone four? How is it that people actually read these books? Or maybe they don't read them, maybe they just buy them for the pictures of her that appear on three of the books' covers? How is it that people read this stuff for more than amusement and raising their heart rate? How are they best-sellers?!

*deep breath* Okay. One final note before I go find something suitably intelligent to wipe this from my mind. Her new book is entitled How to Talk to a Liberal (If You Must): The World According to Ann Coulter. I feel like it should be something like How to Talk to a Liberal (If You Have a Death Wish) or How to Talk to a Liberal (If You Want to Showcase Your Ignorance). And really, posing in front of a chalkboard, as if she were here to teach us? And here to teach us while wearing what looks to be a black leather vest, no less.

Okay, off for some mind-cleansing.